(no subject)

[essayel]

Today I saw a very scary illustration of the old saw that our civilisation is only a couple of meals and some manners away from barbarism. It's true guys! Srsly.

Fridays I take my mother food shopping. Hey ho funtimes! But it has to be done so I make a bit of an outing of it and drive her to a nearby town where I can park close to a big supermarket and she can push her trolley round easily.

Today we started shopping as normal and, about half way round, heard an announcement that the checkouts were having some technical problems but that they hoped to be working properly shortly. By the time Mum reached the checkouts the queues were six deep and tempers were rising. By the time I passed by she had six people behind her. Then - OMG - someone pushed in!

Well, the language! I honestly think that if the place hadn't been crammed with people and trolleys and babies in push chairs two elderly women behind Mum would have dismembered the silly woman who pushed in at the front. We Brits take queueing deadly seriously but don't normally do much other than roll our eyes and murmur a quiet, "Oh how rude!" These two old birds were sharpening a pole to take the queue-jumper's head.

Mum and I looked at each other and sighed but I still had dog and cat food to get so I left her to continue to act as a buffer zone - sort of no-man's land in a blue knitted woolly and a perm.

Never let it be said that I can't make the most of a situation. As I went through the music, dvd, magazine, newspaper and books section I spotted a pile of remaindered paperbacks at 3 for £4 and grabbed a couple of familiar sounding authors and spent my time in the horrendous queues giggling madly as I racked up points for the main character in a mental Mary-Sue Litmus Test. I can't wait to read the rest of it and see if it's as much fun as it promises to be. Yay, for OTT vampire erotica and to Christine Feehan and Sherrilin Kenyon for writing it. Even more yay to Morrisons for stocking them at such affordable prices!

Comments

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

Queue jumpers are just so annoying! It's as if they just don't realise other people are even waiting!!!! *blood boils*

and hey, I like Christine Feehan's vampire erotica! Not read any of the Sherrilin Kenyon books yet. My local morrisons don't seem to have them in ever....

Ah well, in a few hours I might not care, have bought a EuroMillions Lottery ticket.... if I go very quiet for a couple of days, it's either the predictable depression that I didn't win, or me living it up and not worrying about money any more!

[essayel.livejournal.com]

Good luck. If you win you can buy ALL the Feehan books and a bookshelf to keep them on.

She's reponsible for the guy in the queue behind me hurrumphing, "Well I'm glad someone finds the situation amusing," as I whooped laughing when the hero turned into a leopard and whooshed off the M-SLT scale. I think I'll get on better with these than the Anita Blake ones because it's 3rd person and a male protagonist rather than 1st person female. I haven't been able to identify with female characters in books since I hit puberty.

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

Oh there are leopards, wolves, owls, all sorts, including mist! But, I wouldn't want to spoil them for you!

[essayel.livejournal.com]

There's only the one Feehan and I'm not too worried about spoilers because I sort of guess that he and the gorgeous rockstar chick with the memerising voice and pet leopards with 'ebony eyes' get it on - in fact that she becomes his life mate and saves him from a sizzly early morning death.

Oh these are going to be almost as much fun as the Harlequin Historicals.

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

They are mostly light hearted escapism from the 'real' world, into a fantasy landscape which provides amusement, and some 'time off' from being anything but engrossed in the story.

They're fun. Basically.

[essayel.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I could do with some fun.

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

Oh and yeah, guaranteed a happy ending.

[irana.livejournal.com]

Sounds like she's a fan of White Wolf.

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

What is this "white wolf" of which you speak? Would I like it? Can I read it???? Does it have dragons?

*does puppy impression*

[irana.livejournal.com]

http://www.white-wolf.com/

It's a role play system and it has vampires, mages, werewolves, etc.

[anghara13.livejournal.com]

Does the phrase "OOOOOOH!!!!" ring any bells???

*RUNS off to look at it*

[britalone.livejournal.com]

We used to be called a nation of shopkeepers. I've always thought of Britain as a nation of queuers! It's what we do best after all!" lol
But I have noticed that people are less inclined to put up with queues these days and especially not queue jumpers! At least you found a diversion! ;o)

[essayel.livejournal.com]

A very entertaining one too!

Yes, we queue very well, and i think that's good. There's not much point pushing and shoving when all's said and done and I reckon that people who don't respect that kind of patience need to be prepared to spend some time looking for their teeth.

[cweb.livejournal.com]

3 books for 4 pounds?? Nice...
Must check out the Mary-Sue test:)

I'm pretty much the same...mutter "how rude" when someone queue-jumps (even though I feel they should be shot).

[essayel.livejournal.com]

Shot or at the very least have a cucumber inserted violently where the sun don't shine.

The Mary-Sue test is a great boon to aspiring writers. It's also good fun to put characters from published books through it and see how they do. Publishing companies accept stuff that would be howled off the boards in any sensible fan fiction community.

[celticangel76.livejournal.com]

Our local Wal-Mart is horrible about only having five or six registers open - out of like 20. When it's busy. And we're lined up eight deep. And they won't even open one of the fast check out lanes for people with just a few things so I'm standing there with like... 3 items while the four people in front of me have basket fulls.

I tend to glare if someone jumps in the line. Hubby says a few choice words and makes sure they're loud enough for the person to hear it.

[essayel.livejournal.com]

I really wish I had the cojones to shout "Oy, hop it, you pushy bad mannered bitch," because, much though I hate to admit it, it's always women who do it and I'm sure they are ex-'Daddy's little princesses' who haven't heard the word 'no' often enough.

Wal-Mart is evil *nods* or so I have been told.

Note icon - they are always with us

[celticangel76.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't say Wal-Mart is evil it's just... well... Wal-Mart. It's convenient enough for me to put up with any evilness.

Icon noted and snuggled

[open-the-blinds.livejournal.com]

*in her best South Park impression*: "There is evil there that does not sleep."

;)

[irana.livejournal.com]

Over here it's the queues for gas since nearly every station is out and oh, the language and attitudes!

Sherrilin Kenyon btw, is great fun to talk to. I'm not sure how much of the world she takes seriously or can't make fun of.

[essayel.livejournal.com]

Gas - gah! I remember the petrol shortages in the 70s when perfectly reasonable men fought like dogs on gas station forecourts over the last pint of 4 star. I sincerely hope the pipelines get repaired soon.


I sort of guessed those books had to be written tongue in cheek. I think you've just confirmed it. Now I can giggle with a clear conscience.

[surexit.livejournal.com]

Queue jumpers should be taken outside and shot, man. :D Also, I love that we can queue. It's such a, like, civilised skill, and almost everyone on our whole tiny little island can do it properly.

[essayel.livejournal.com]

Something upon which we can still pride ourselves!

*giggles at your icon*